Sunday, June 5, 2011

Starting Fresh for a Blended Family

Starting a new family is can be both refreshing and difficult. But imagine starting a blended family wherein you combine two sets of non-blood related families living under one roof… sounds like a formula for chaotic children right? Not if you plan well and be very diplomatic about it.

Losing balance of blended families is not surprising especially when noncustodial children drop them a visit. Moms and dads become surprisingly Super Step Moms and Disney Dads trying their very best to look good and please the children every minute of every day. This may give short term gratification for both of you and the children but we all know that giving children everything will only create problems later on.

House rules should be applied to all children: whether they are just visiting or living with you full time. Treat them equally and play no favourites. Visiting children should be given one on one time with their parent but not too long to isolate each family. Don’t forget to involve all kids equally in family activities. Don’t make them feel like a visitor! They are all members of a blended family unit.

Moreover, don’t forget to plan quality time with your spouse. Time outs with your spouse are the best way to make your marriage strong and resilient. Plan dates ahead for at least twice a month. Having a moment alone with your better half will keep your marriage alive.

Lastly, don’t forget a time for yourself. Even simply taking a long bubble bath or reading a favourite novel can do the trick. The goal is to not forget how to relax and enjoy yourself. Discover what time of the day you can fit your “Me Time”. Learning how to relax is vital in enjoying your family life.

Having a hard time? Then you might need help.