Getting Blended Family Finances Grip

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When two families join together, it normally seems that everything has a financial implication, starting with where everyone will live all the way through to who will pay for college tuitions of the kids. If you have not already had a serious discussion regarding blended family finances, you ought to, as soon as possible. When you and your new blended family partner contemplate forming a blended family, you can reasonably expect that visitation and extra-curricular activity schedules will dominate many of your conversations and your day to day plans. The challenges do not stop there.

In several blended family situations, this could be a contentious issue. A prenup can go a long way toward reassuring your step kids you will neither squander nor claim their entire inheritance!  Many couples shy away from having a prenup, disliking the negative flavor it gives to their remarriage.  However, not only does it spell out what each of you owns and can expect if you end up single again, a pre-marriage agreement also lets one spouse waive rights to property, such as a family camp or a savings account which the other spouse wants to preserve for his or her biological kids.

There are many things included in a step family and challenges to be faced especially in financial needs. If you don’t know where to start getting these blended family problems of fixed or do not have an idea on the proper way to tackle them, you can visit The Blended and Step Family Resource Center.

Making Blended Family Home the Place to be

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It actually takes time to build a blended family since it requires also patience, information, understanding and a good plan. Knowing what you want for your blended family and understanding the challenges and pitfalls inherent the family life in order to achieve the best for your blended family goals.  Establishing positive connections between the step parents and step kids is one of the specific issues that make the blended family challenging.

Make certain you know and show support for the individual talents and interests of each family member. Praise effort as well as accomplishments; encourage creativity; celebrate differences. Work on your marital relationship so that your kids and step kids can learn how loving people deal with one another. Within your blended family, model conflict resolution; speak with considerate and kind words; deal immediately and effectively with disrespectful or abusive behavior, and keep arguments between you and your blended family partner fair and private. Develop a safe haven for children to grow in. People need acceptance, and your blended family home is the best and safest place for your kids to find it. Let your home be a place of unconditional love for everyone in your extended step family. Set aside at least an hour every day to spend with your blended family members. Take special care to set aside one-on-one time with bio kids at least once a week, to be sure your connection does not get lost in the mix.

Reasonable Efforts for Step Moms in Blended Family

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Most challenging jobs that women can have might be becoming a step mom. One of the people who is primarily responsible for managing the home is the blended family mother, which maintaining a loving relationship with her husband besides from looking after the step kids as well as her own biological children. Furthermore, she is also holding down an outside job. Therefore, she is in charge of everyone’s happiness.

Your ex-husband thinks threatened by the presence of your new husband in the life of his kids, and even in your life.  Both your step kids and your bio kids are battling in order to deal with their own feelings of their confusion, loss, and with the new step family dynamic. Becoming step siblings does not come naturally to either set of kids, and anger and resentment may be the only thing they have in mutual. Your in-laws, both present and past, are worried what your remarriage might mean regarding how often they get to see their grandkids, and how welcome they will be in the new step family setting.

There are many things included in the blended family that most step kids are having difficulties of. They normally suffer from their loss greatly and need guidance from their parents. Therefore, the love from your husband and remarriage will help you blended family to succeed and prosper. If you still don’t know where to begin, you can visit The Blended and Step Family Resource Center for more information.

Challenges Comes with Step Parenting in a Blended Family

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Love has something more when you love again since it includes more children to your family as a mix. You are surely interested about building new blended family but having doubt about your role as a step parent if you will be doing great as well as acceptance from the step kids. Although parents have a wonderful role, it also includes ups and downs in the process. Blending two families can be difficult but you can make it as long as you have built a loving and caring relationship with your step kids.

It can be intimidating sometimes when it comes to raising a child that is not biologically from you. Being a step parent, you might as well encounter the feeling of being an outsider. You may come across questioning yourself also about your confidence and competence when it comes to the step parent role. Most of the step kids may consider you as the reason why their parent will not be back together again and also being jealous to the time their parent spent with you. You and your step family will actually wonder if all things will get better with such setup. The ex-spouse of your new partner might as well be worries about your way on treating the children especially when it comes to the influence to their children. So if you want to understand more of the details about step parenting, consider visiting The Blended and Step Family Resource Center for more valuable info.

About Making Blended Family Successful in a Relationship

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In the life of the newlywed couples without children, life can be easier to tackle. However, in the blended family with children, it is quite hard due to the demands of their children to spend time in order to build the great relationship needed for it to succeed. Balancing the time and energy between the children and their new spouse is considered to be difficult when it comes to the survival of their blended family.

It is clear that a newly blended family with a young child might demand an unparalleled attention to the parents especially since they or it is undergoing to the setting. The child normally felt that with the new step parent, it may consider her or his self-abandoned. Also, the attention to the step siblings can also be threatening when attempting to create a caring and loving relationship with the kids or step kids. Therefore, it is hard to balance the desires of the not so happy child as well as the obligations and joys from the new blended family. It is necessary on this part that you and your partner must make a move to protect your marriage especially that the blended family relationship is being back burner.

If you don’t know how or where to begin, you can visit The Blended and Step Family Resource Center to obtain the necessary advice to make your step family succeed in this kind of battles or journey. Remember that having blended family is different from the conventional family.

About the Roles of Grandparents in Blended Family Occassions

Grandparents are normally left swinging in breeze when their child divorces especially when there is a child left in non-custodial parent. Normally in such cases, they missed the conventional family celebrations such as birthdays, Christmas, thanksgiving, Hanukah and many other occasions.

Grandparents still have the same role in the new step family but will be bigger especially when the new spouse has children or kids and reentered remarriage with his or her son or daughter. The life will be more improved and useful tool in making wonderful and pleasant relationship with your step grandchildren. The benefits children will earn more from the loving and caring grandparents that is normally immeasurable. You can also help your grandchildren to adjust to the new step family by supporting them to their roles. The first step to do this is to accept the step siblings with open arms and open heart.

If you want to be welcome or make yourself feel welcome to the new blended family, you must treat every member as if they are real family. You need to consider treating the step kids also as fair from your heart and from your mind. Without doing this will put the relationship of them to you or yours to uncomfortable situation which will make it hard to adjust for all of you. If you don’t know how to begin, you can go to The Blended and Step Family Resource Center and obtain the best advice from the website.

Birthdays and Special Holidays Arrangements in Blended Family

You and your ex-spouse may agree to the parenting arrangement that covers your kids in terms of their birthdays and holidays. This is a great decision since you have a plan for your kids and without having such plan will surely results to disappointments from your kids or arguments to your ex-spouse.

Conflict-free celebration is one of the best gifts that you can give to your kids when it comes to celebrating special days with them. You might as well want to consider about adjustments to the plan every time it is needed and not sticking to the old one. In essence, do not take it personally when your kids wanted to celebrate holidays with your ex-spouse. Think about the benefits of the kids from it even if the day is actually scheduled for you. Therefore, it is important to consider celebrating with them at another time that is parallel like such situation.

If you remember the days when living as one family, it is more necessary to perform more planning with step family when you compared. It is essential to communicate often with your kids and to your ex-spouse to avoid disappointments because timetables that are unworkable or misunderstood may cause more problems.

If you want to know more information about blended family and celebrating birthdays or holidays with your kids, you can visit the Blended and Step Family Resource Center. You can also check the advice offered at the website that will surely be useful for your situations.

Blended Family is Normal Nowadays

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Possibilities for a blended or step family to be normal

Blended family is becoming more and more usual nowadays. More step parents and new blended family partners as well are looking for helps and information from their challenges that they are undergoing. In the past, blended family relies on the normal nuclear family ways of running the system especially on how well they are doing. Due to the help of website who provide support for blended family, comparing the details between blended family and nuclear family is much easier.

Losses in the blended family

Normally, blended family evolves from a loss family that leads to remarriages. All people involved had experienced the loss of their nuclear family. The feelings they possess now it what will happen to them and why they deserve such situation to happen on them. This is the instability results from their loss.

Gains in your step family

The widowed or divorced parents who normally find someone who they can share their life are somewhat fortunate. There are many possibilities from this kind of situations where they begin again to fall in love and making plans for a future just like the first time they did. A blended family is however involves family combinations from the remarriages of the parents and step parents wherein they consider it as an advantage for their kids.

If you need help for your step kids or looking for information about blended family advice, you can visit The Blended and Step Family Resource Center.

Happily Ever After Never Comes Easy for Blended Family

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The difficulty of stepfamily living is what makes many blended family fall since they are not prepared. Most people believe that lessons learned from your first marriage are enough in order to succeed with the remarriage. If you are already a parent, you assume that figuring out how to be a good step parent would be easy. Well, happily ever after is not given to such relationship easily.

Reality strikes in the step family

Stepfamilies are not very much like first families in the reality for many blended family couples especially if unprepared. The time generally allows the couple to enjoy being together especially to the building process of the relationship, which is normally before the children arrives.

Be prepared in your remarriage

The smart blended family couples normally see the potential of problems and do not get blindsided by the assumptions according to the Brady Bunch reruns on TV. They study the concepts of blended families that are successful and work at their marriages. They also know to overcome problems that may arise to their relationship as well as to their kids and able to surpass it. This is important to them especially to their step kids that expecting the problems will be ideal and make things much easier to resolve.

Should you need more info about blended family, you can do so by heading to the website of The Blended and Step Family Resource Center. Check out the website today and get to know the concepts of remarriage that can help you.

Investing Communication for Relationship of Blended Family

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The odds are against the blended family especially if you and your wife has been married and then divorced with children. In the US, the rates of divorces are about 45 percent for first marriages, which is frightening enough. The divorce rate for a blended family is over 60 percent up to 70 percent for third marriage blended families.

How to avoid being included to those percentages? First you must understand that relationship needs effort and time. It is easy to take your partner but the one you cherish and love for granted. As time goes by, you forget to appreciate the things that were once special. You forget to take effort and time to do the little things he or she loved for you to do. You forgot to have sex as often and even let it become a routine event for both of you. You stop being grateful for everyday that you are both together. Making sure your relationship gets the care it deserves is vital to both of you especially for stressors of blended family life.

Communication is key in a step family

Why there are things that make the relationship fail, without having communications will make the situation more badly. The problem with blended family relationships is that they both believe they have been there and seen the disasters. Therefore, having communication with your spouse is important to make things work well. If you need more advice, you can visit The Blended and Step Family Resource Center.

About the Myths of Blended Family Life

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You’ve made a decision when you and your new partner decided to form a new blended family that is beneficial to the children partly. You will have to put several considerations to this kind of decision since you will be happier and secure in yourself as well as able to be more giving to your children, which in return the children will also be happier.

Whose choice is it?

Who chose to create the blended family and who decided that combining their lives with their new step parent and their kids was a great idea? Not you kids. By entering to this decision you are making a decision where the kids are going to blend with the universe since the person is not their usual parent. Therefore, there is no doubt that these step kids are not going to be well close with their new step parent.

Helping kids in a blended family cope

Acknowledging the feelings of your kids to cope with the new remarriage you bought into their lives is one of the best things you can to do them to help them. Talk and listen to your kids and let them express what they think about it. By doing this, you will make them also as an active listener in return. If you want your step kids to listen to you or to your partner, you will have to listen to them also.

Should you need more information about blended family, you can call or visit The Blended and Step Family Resource Center website.

Adult Step Kids Makes Step Parent Struggles

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Most people think that entering remarriage arrangement with adult children would not include struggles for blended family. You might also think that the children will accept their new step parent since they understand their parent’s happiness. Not necessary and not always. Actually, it is hardly that you would think also that there would only few issues between step kids and step parents.

Expectations for an all-adult blended family

People with adult children will generally think that they have entirely reasonable expectation as they will be free to concentrate on each other when entering a new blended family. They have already raised their own children and look forward to a relationship free from tension and stress if they were expecting raising step kids. The happy adult blended family scenarios takes time, lowering of expectations and understanding in many cases where sweet model matches reality.

What is the problem with adults kids in a blended family

The real question you need to put into your mind is what grown children possess against their parent being happy. Why they are not happy that you found new relationship with someone who will share with your lonely life. You might also think that growing families would feel relief by not having to worry about you being along. The truth is, their problem might also be the same as it might be if they were still living at home.

Should you need help or advice for your new blended family especially when it comes to step kids, you can visit The Blended and Step Family Resource Center.

Blended Family’s Differences may become Conflict

You might have given up expecting your new blended family to be same as your previous one. There are lots of differences between the two families. Generally speaking, a new couple sets off on a new life together in nuclear family with supports of friends and love ones.

When a child is born, the couples learn to care for, love and appreciate the child. They also start to redefine each other, moving from partners and lovers to co-parents accepting these relationship changes as they come along simply in a part of the way family life is and ought to be. Also, having children makes the relationship much deeper.

Look at your blended family as unique

The new blended couples make it hard to establish a home together due to the nuclear family. By the time that the new blended family couples establishes a home together, and then have been through many loss, legal battles and heartbreak. Therefore, they are being provoked by experiences in the past. They also suffer usually from recrimination from love ones and friends. So having a blended family is something unique and differs from one couple to another.

Should you be experiencing the same as what have been mentioned here, you can contact The Blended and Step Family Resource Center or you can visit them to find out more about having and keeping your blended family efficiently. You can also check the other offers they provide for blended family or step kids related concerns.

Setting Boundaries with Blended Family is needed for Ex-spouses

Setting boundaries to protect the autonomy of the remarriage is essential while extending the blended family into a working relationship with an ex-spouse. There are some instances where ex-spouse steps across the lines of divorce or remarriage. Whether the reason is to increase the old ties or having hard time redefining a post-divorce relationship, it can be considered as an intrusion to the new blended family life of the person. Therefore, you need to know what you can do, what should you do and how you can determine the okay and not okay situations.

What is appropriate contact between ex-spouses?

It is always appropriate to have a communication for kids when it comes to the partner and his or her ex-spouse if they have children together. Co-parenting takes cooperative collaboration and communications in order to make parents effective is crucial. There are some instances that ex-spouses have business together or share other properties. Whatever the reason it may be, accepting and supporting the necessary communication is essential for your blended family partner. If there is no reason for remaining ties, then having a continued contact is not necessary for the ex-spouses.

Having text, call or emails daily with the ex-spouse can be defined as not having the essence of divorce since it will lead to not able to letting go of the relationship. If you want to know more of the details about blended family, then you can visit The Blended and Step Family Resource Center to get the best advice.

Fabled wicked step mothers seek to control blended family

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After their parents divorce and dad enters into anew marriage with a stranger, many kids quickly associate their new step mother with the fairy tale version. How easy is it for a stepmother to stumble into the role of wicked step mother?

Rough beginnings for step mothers

Going through a divorce with their parents can leave many children feeling like victims in an adult world which ignores their wants and needs, and sometimes treats them like contested property

Are you a wicked step mother?

• You demand that your husband choose you over his kids. They have to learn they no longer are his first priority and are not running the show anymore.
• You take no interest in the lives or interests of your step kids. They are not your problem, and have nothing to do with you. Birthdays? You are not their mother.
• When the step kids come to your house, you let them know they are only there as visitors, unlike your own children who live with you full time.
• You are too busy to attend games, plays, or award ceremonies your step kids are involved in. Their own mother should take care of that.
• You do not bother to provide a permanent place in your home for your step kids to sleep. They are only visiting, and they know how to make up the couch by themselves.
• You ask your step kids prying questions about their mother so you can point out how much better you are in comparison. You say negative things about their mother.
• You use phrases like, “When you are in my house…”
• You expect your step kids to be grateful for all that you do for them. 

As a step parent, you are in a position to make the blended family experiencehappy and loving, one that adds value to their lives. Often, later in life, step kids finally look back at their step parents with love and gratitude. For many step mothers, the wait is worth it. For more information, visit The Blended and Step Family Resource Center.

Visitation agreements not all they are cracked up to be

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Visitation arrangements are settled during separation or divorce, and both parties agree to abide by them. You and your new spouse know that building your blended family is easier when you take care of your own relationship. Likewise, when you and your ex-spouse can agree that what is best for the children shall be the keystone of your co-parenting arrangement, the kids will be freed from constant wrangling and court appearances.

Getting along with your ex-spouse

With a divorce and remarriage in their recent experience, kids need to know they can really rely on you two getting along well enough to be parents; otherwise it can be really difficult for them to feel safe and secure, or trust that you will do right by them. Children often feel responsible when parents divorce, and having them fight about custody and visitation matters reinforces that belief.

Communication with your ex-spouse

Cooperative or not, you will always have to communicate with your ex-spouse about your children. When you do, regardless of whether he or she is cooperative or not, here are some guidelines for communication.

@Stay on message

@Stay cool

@Stay away from finger pointing and old arguments

@Keep going back to your point if the subject gets changed

@Keep it about the kids, and only the kids

@Keep it between the two of you; never ask kids to carry messages

In order of preference, the means of communicating with an ex-spouse is by email, texting, voice mail, telephone conversation, and only if all else fails, with a personal meeting. When you have a parental issue to handle, an email offers you the best opportunity to set the right wording and tone.

Make visitation work

If you remember that spending time with their other parent is for and about the children, not an accommodation to your ex-spouse, hassles and scheduling snafus take on less inconvenience and annoyance. Encourage your kids to have a great time and enjoy being with their other parent. Send no messages via the children. Have them ready for pick up if that is the arrangement, and make sure you are ready to receive them when they are dropped back home.

Your primary relationship

While it is important to have a good relationship with your ex-spouse, be sure to put your major efforts into your primary relationship: the one with your new spouse and the blended family you are building together. Visit The Blended and Step Family Resource Center for more information on how to make visitation agreements work.

A harmonious blended family: fiction or fact?

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Balancing child rearing philosophy, energy, and commitment is often no fun for a blended family step parent. Feeling torn between your new spouse, stepchildren, and your own kids when you are trying to keeping everybody on board your blended family boat from a mutiny can be a challenge-but achievable! Here’s how:

·         Assess the situation.

·         Set your goal.

·         Create a plan.

·         Follow through.

·         Continually re-assess the situation.

·         Revisit your goal.

·         Revise your plan if needed.

·         Follow through.

Acknowledge the struggle

When you and your new spouse created this blended family, if you expected that two separate established families with established routines and methods, and with established rules and expectations, could blend together easily, you were being blinded by love. Some say that anything worth having is worth struggling for; they may well be talking about blended families. 

Have discussions about childrearing when you are alone

If you and your spouse discuss a hot parenting issue for the first time in front of you kids, you may be setting yourselves, and your kids, up for confusion and discomfort. Besides agreeing that you and your spouse will always present a united stance in front of the kids, you should both know that if you argue in front of children, it affects them in several different ways.

Say what you feel

Unless you tell your spouse or step kids how you feel and why, it is not fair for either you or your child to feel misunderstood. Harmony can only be realized in a blended family where everyone knows what is and is not expected of them. Tell your spouse exactly what you need in order to feel accepted, special, and an important part of their life.\

Mutually agree on consequences for breaking house rules
Do not assume your accustomed style of disciplining your kids is appropriate for your step kids. You and your spouse must have a frank discussion about whatever rules and consequences existed before the blended family.

Step up to the task
Make it a major goal to develop a relationship with each step kid, one that has nothing to do with your spouse. Set aside special time for you and your step kid to interact alone. For more information, visit The Blended and Step FamilyResource Center.

Co-parenting and joint custody in an extended blended family

A blended family has more members than we sometimes acknowledge, so it may be helpful now and then to take a renewed look at your extended family structure. A successful blended family makes accommodations with an ex-spouse and his or her new partner, and understanding how much they impact kids who spend time at their home in a joint custody arrangement.

Making co-parenting and joint custody work

An amicable co-parenting and joint custody partnership with your ex-spouse is one of the most important relationships you can cultivate. When both parents set aside their own personal issues and put them first, children gain a kind of stability and self-worth that is hard to match.

Co-parenting after a divorce and marriage

After your divorce and remarriage, the only relationship you have with your ex-spouse is that of co-parents of your children. It can help to begin thinking of the relationship as something completely new, something quite outside of you and your ex-spouse.

Co-parenting is the best option for your children

When you and your ex-spouse work together in cooperation for their benefit, your kids see that they are more important than whatever conflict ended the marriage. They can understand that your love for them will prevail, no matter what.

If your ex-spouse has also remarried

You deserve and expect consideration and respect for your role as a step parent to the biological children of your new blended family partner. Likewise, your consideration and respect for your ex-spouse’s new partner is called for, as well.

Enlist your partner’s help

Co-parenting with someone you wish you never had to see again is not easy, and it can sometimes take its toll in tension and exasperation. Keep personal issues with your ex-spouse away from your children and never, ever say negative things to them about your ex.

For more information on how to keep and strengthen your blended family, visit The Blended and Step Family Resource Center.

Blended family couples struggle against the odds

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Blended family success rates are struggling to keep up with the failure rates. Second marriages end in divorce at an higher rate than first marriages do. How can we avoid repeating the same disillusionment and pain? These tips may help you and your blended family partner keep from falling into those couple traps that lead to poor relationship dynamics.

Give your relationship the respect it deserves. If you think that shifting your main focus away from your spouse and onto the children will help the situation, you do everyone a disservice. Your strong relationship is the glue that keeps your blended family together. Work together in a conscious effort to build a relationship of mutual respect and understanding.

Be safe. No matter what one person says in anger, you both agree that your marriage and your relationship will stay secure. If one of you is hesitant to speak their mind for fear of reaction or threats of divorce, your safety zone has been breached.

Fight fair. The first rule of fair fighting is, of course, no physical violence-ever. The second rule is, fight only about the subject at hand, without dragging out other complaints, too. Keeping things as cool as possible is always a good goal, and throwing new and old issues around like darts is never cool.

Forget about the small stuff. Learn how to distinguish between big problems and little ones. In the category of big problems you will tend to see things like health, financial security, welfare of the children, fidelity, and such.

Life has stress and strains, and so what? If you wish to know more about keeping it together as a blended family couple, contact The Blended and Step Family Resource Center.

Step parenting roles for step moms and step dads

Being a step mom or a step dad is a hard job, no doubt about it. Chances are you came into this step parent position with little or no training for it. When you come right down to it, few of us looked into the future to see ourselves as step parents!

Suggestions for step parent role limits

Children of divorce and remarriage benefit from close ties to both bio parents, and you can help by encouraging them to work things out for the benefit of the kids while you stand back. Oh, you still hold an important position in your step family, to be sure. You need to be the person who is objective, fair, kind, and accepting of your spouse and of the children, no matter what else is happening. Your step kids have likely been navigating between battling parents for quite some time, and they can probably use a bit of stability and calm from you.

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Their parents probably can, too. You can help with that. You can support your spouse and his or her parenting goals by presenting a united stand with your step kids. You might advocate for a different approach now and then if you feel you must, and not appear to be taking sides if you are open and honest and above all, fair.

If your  step kids have lost their other parents, either through death or by absence, your step parent role increased, buy your main role is to support your spouse as he or she parents her children. Until your step kids have fully accepted you in a parental role, you are relegated to the equally significant and reputable role as partner to their bio parent.

Parenting is difficult. Step parenting is harder. But when step parents approach the role in the same way parents do, by doing what is best for the children  and for the blended family, everyone benefits. For more information on keeping blended family relationships, visit The Blended and Step Family Resource Center.